what's sexy now?

* tight tops (boys and girls)
* women dressing modestly
* pin stripe suits on men.
* velvet evening jackets
* large tattoos (instead of lots of scattered little ones)
* platinum blondes
* natural soft brunettes
* classic cell phone ring tones
* rock and roll (always)
* martinis
* coronas
* speaking french
* eating healthy
* people who don't know they're sexy
* button-down shirts for men
* natural-looking make-up/no make-up at all
* dark denim
* big sunglasses
* men who carry bags
* holding doors for strangers
* big smiles
* being comfortable in your own skin
* dancing (always sexy)
* skirts that aren't microscopic, but still flirty
* sleeping naked in summer
* sleeping in comfy pajamas in fall
* boys with pocket pooches
* women with dobermans
* having a sense of humor
* enjoying the smaller things
* letting your hair grow
* exercising
* skinny-dippin'
* sleeping in
* iPods
* having smooth skin
* celebs creating scents (a la sarah jessica parker)
* uggs for fall
* house music
* boxing boots
* bubble baths
* black

anything to add?

miss trash

poor tara reid...what ever happened to lil' miss american pie? do you remember her way back then? she played the virgin-girl-next-door in that movie, who desperately wanted to lose it to her boyfriend on prom night...the way she always dreamed of! now look at her!!! all cracked out, and without a shred of dignity. maybe she should use some of that money to buy herself a clue!

the thing is with poor tara, she had a run of semi-ok movies for a while there; the american pie flicks were fun, and she had a few romantic comedies thrown in for good measure...and actually i don't know if any of you saw the indie-date-rape-party movie"body shots" but if you haven't, i suggest you check it out.

but that's all in the past, cause now the former miss maxim magazine (she was the only one to ever have two cover issues in the same year) has since become the front-slut for "wild on", and has since fallen back into her dirty party-ways (see above photo), and back with that silly little booze-soaked entourage (so jealous) including the likes of lindsay-coked-out-lohan (love you) and paris-marrying-someone-with-same-name-hilton (see you at the wedding)...

it's sad when celebs do this; they try to reform their images, allowing themselves to be quoted saying things like "i don't want to be known as the drunk girl anymore...i want to be taken serious", then they turn around the next day and get boob implants, and a week later get caught having a "wardrobe mafunction" and flash the new goods to everyone in front of thousands!!

my advice miss reid is to straighten up and fly right if you really want to be taken seriously as an actress, and try to salvage any bit of dignity that you can scrape up...or if you just want to keep up your wild ways, then shut the fuck up and deal with it!!

it's fame...it's sepposed to be dirty!

blake and joey get animated

me and harls

the little prince

i can't tell you how excited i am to finally know how to upload pictures on my blog. now i promise you that even though i now know how to add photos, i won't cut out my verbal-frenzy-whipping-topics of discussion! but i may go a little crazy at first, cause it's so damn fun!!!

now the reason i decided to have my first picture be one of "the little prince", or for all you francophones (and for those of you who simply read the book in french) "le petit prince", he's the most wonderful character in literature today!! written by antoine de-saint-exupéry as what started out as a childrens novel, "the little prince" evolved into one of the most lovely stories ever told. yours truly read it in grade 12 french class, and fell in love with the story on the spot.

it tells the tale of a little prince who lives on a small little planet, all by himself somewhere out there in the galaxy. it chronicles his search for a friend in a universe that seems too vast. along the way he meets many a different character all the while trying to avoid the baobabs (the bad guys).

the great thing about it, is that while originally written for children, it evolved into a HUGE cult classic novel adored by the likes of many. melanie used to come home from raves and get all cuddled up on the coach (still whacked) and smoke cigarettes and read the little prince!!! too much fun! we even had a theory that the little prince was a raver; why just look at his spiky hair and wide pants!!

from a certain angle, he kinda looks like me! don't you think?

anyways, the wee book is available on the internet if you google "the little prince" it comes right up. so you have no excuse not to read it. i urge you all to indulge, and enjoy the magic that is...the little prince!

drew love

"can an ordinary guy land a date with drew barrymore? brian herzlinger gave himself 30 days to find out"

this is the header of a people magazine article about some joe-blow-schumck (yes, i'm a tad jealous) who decided to pursue a childhood crush he had on drew barrymore, in hopes of scoring a date with the luscious voluptuary. check out his pitch:

single mensch, 29, seeking date-just one-with beautiful charlie's angels star of boyhood dreams. l.a.-based aquarius filmmaker enjoys quirky challenges, singing in cars and grease 2 (puh-leeze). looking for one very special actress who believes in fate...

you get the drift. i don't know if you've heard of him or not, but his story even made it onto entertainment tonight, (and apparently into people magazine). this guy made a documentary called "my date with drew" (how original), in which he tries every trick in the book to land a date with his idol. he chronicles his quest, from a practice date with a drew look-alike, to a painful attempt at a chest wax (pussy). while the premise sounds like a pretty desperate attempt to score a date of ANY kind...it might have merit...IF IT WEREN'T MY DREAM HE'S IMPEDING ON!!??!!

and listen to this; when asked why drew, he says "for her to get through the child-actor phase and become one of the biggest stars in the world, and to retain this positive outlook on life-i respect her for that"...i'm pretty sure i said the exact same thing before...grrr...

now i'm not sure if i've ever spoken about my LOVE for drew in the past (on my blog), but if i haven't let me please clarify her and i's relationship; i've loved her longer than any of my other celebrity bitties! drew and i have had a connection since i first started watching movies. hello, Gertie?!? and we've continued to grow in eachothers eyes ever since. she, a troubled teen...struggling with alcohol and drugs, and the pressures of fame, all to rise above and become a beautiful butterfly...not to mention fantastic actor, producer, and template for positive thinking...i a faithful lover of her movies, her views, her tattoos, her fashion sense...we're so tight, as you can see.

i guess you could say that she's had a profound effect on how i look at the world today; she tends to find beauty in everything and tries to not let herself be taken by the negative side of things, and enjoys every minute of the day.

i've stood by her as she made mistakes; hello, tom green! but never judged, for it was never my place to intervene, and praised her for her better choices; the current fabrizio moretti (fantastic name by the way, dude) with whom i sincerely hope sticks around...if it has to be somebody (other than me) then he's a worthy candidate, so was luke wilson...but i don't know what happened there!

so i encourage you to find this character "brian herzlinger" and bash his docu-movie about my sweet drew...cause let's face it, i thought of it first...

DANCE DANCE DANCE

so if this were a normal monday afternoon, dancing would be a tad bit far from my mind...however, this is not a normal monday afternoon. this particular monday is my first official day with my new fully loaded toy.

what new toy would that be, you ask? well, that would be my new iPOD!!!!! oh, iPOD how do i love thee, let me count the ways...one, two, three, just kidding!!

so i'm here to tell you that there's no better way to start a monday off than with a good fuckin' dance song. i mean, honestly besides a quickie before you shower, can you think of a better way to start a monday off with than a swift kick to your temples with a pounding dance track? well stop thinking about it, cause there isn't!!

we all know that music makes the world go 'round. and one of the most splendiferous side-effects of music, is the movement it produces. i'm talkin' about DANCING!!! groovin', shakin', swayin' to the music! whatever your style; dirty, breaks, hooch, rock, metal, electric!!!

dancing is, in my opinion the purest form of self expression there is! there's something completely primal about dancing. when you find yourself lost in the beat and you envision yourself as the only person on the dance floor...now that's a higher state!

my friends say that when i get into it, i get this look on my face; we call it joey's dancin' face. my expression contorts, and i kinda purse out my lips and get this "GIV'ER" look in my eyes!!!! it's sometimes mixed with spontaneous tongue thrusts to the air, and girrating motions. the whole process has proven to be contageous and highly addictive.

i mean come on, when's the last time you went out dancin' and didn't feel fuckin' amazing afterwards?? (liquor and drug effects not counting). there's so much endorphins that are produced into the body when you dance, and it's probably the best high you can get.

if i haven't heard beats in a while, i get this rumbling down inside...and the only way to release it, is to DANCE DANCE DANCE!!! just fuck everything going on at work, and anything stressful in your life, and just give yourself over to the music! surrender everything and just let your body move!!

and if you have to think about the last time you had a dance party (whether out in a club setting or in the comfort of your own home) then it's been too long.

so step away from that computer screen, (wherever you are), but on a kick ass song and bust a move! it's true what they say; when you dance, the whole world dances with you!!!

shake it

the BIG 5 results

Extroversion results were very high which suggests you are overly talkative, outgoing, sociable and interacting at the expense too often of developing your own individual interests and internally based identity.

Orderliness results were moderately high which suggests you are, at times, overly organized, neat, structured and restrained at the expense too often of flexibility, variety, spontaneity, and fun.

Emotional Stability results were medium which suggests you are moderately relaxed, calm, secure, and optimistic.

Accommodation results were moderately high which suggests you are, at times, overly kind natured, trusting, and helpful at the expense of your own individual development (martyr complex).

Inquisitiveness results were moderately high which suggests you are intellectual, curious, imaginative but possibly not very practical.



i don't know if i should have posted these results...don't hate me cause i'm neurotic...

evian

so i'm totally in love with evian water...i know it's almost pretentious these days to be drinking a big fat bottle of evian water while you're all dressed up at work, (why is that actually, how did evian become the bottled water of champions?) but i must say that coming from someone who drinks a 1.5 litre bottle of water daily, evian is totally hitting the spot lately!

now you can tell me it's from the french alps, and that it's been filtered time and time again, till you're blue in the face...but what it really comes down to, is the TASTE!!

you know how some people have a refined palatte for wine, others for beer, (i'm currently working on perfecting both), well i have one for bottled water! it's quite the trait that i developed over the years...mostly since becoming an employee at the department (due to the fact that it can get irretatingly dry in here, and water's been my only saviour), but i'm talkin' i can take the freakin' pepsi taste test challenge any ol' day of the silly week with bottled water and kick anybody's ass even with a cold! and as pretentious as it may seem, evian's got the best flavor!

now when shopping for a bottle of water for pure refreshment purposes, it may be tempting to go for the life brand generic brand of water for a mere .99 cents. HOWEVER i urge all of you NOT to, cause you will be disappointed. not only is it foul in taste, but i don't shoppers drug mart can filter water to save it's life...hence the foulness factor. if water could grow mold, then shoppers' life brand water would win the blue ribbon in that contest.

the next product i suggest bypassing is dasani bottled water. while alluring with it's clear blue bottle, and it's tease of refreshing-ness, it's price tag of $1.99 is just simply not worth it. if you're going to spend this much on a bottle of water, then you might as well splurge and go for evian.

whilst evian sells for a whopping $2.49 a bottle, as soon as you take your first long gulp of it's crystal clear taste...you'll know why. i guarantee you'll be taken by it's smoothness and the way that it gushes down your throat and through your whole body, bringing a burst of freshness and cool to every inch...you can almost taste the french alps with every sip you take.

so the next time you're in the drugstore purchasing refreshment in a bottle, cast your eyes upon that beautiful bottle of evian...it really is as wonderful as they say!

a weekend like no other

well all that worrying was for nothing,
as open arms i was greeted with,
the fear of meeting the parents,
was thankfully just a myth.

we swam, built sand-castles,
and soaked up the sun,
we ate turkey and vegan cookies,
and chatted with dad and mum.

we played reverse hide-and-seek,
while drinking southern C and gin,
saw a meteor shower,
had so much fun it was a sin.

dear andy and his dummys,
deserve a stance all of their own,
his property was a sight,
so go enjoy or condone.

it was a weekend like no other,
filled with debauchery and fun,
i almost can't believe,
i flashed that car my little bum!


♪best weekend ever♪

meet the hunsleys

in two wee days,
they'll get to meet the one,
who after all this time,
has fallen in love with their son.

we're travelling on a bus,
to somewhere on the bay,
to a quaint little cottage,
where the family comes to stay.

i've heard so much about them,
little Miss Betty and her Bob,
i hope my crazy hair, tattoos, and piercing,
don't cause them to sob.

i'll be on my best behaviour,
while visiting with the clan,
be sure to keep my nose clean,
so they accept me as i am.

looking forward to eating well,
and visiting with the 'rents,
walking along the water,
and maybe playing in the tent.

oh how i hope they like me,
and are taken by my charm,
Mr. and Mrs. Hunsley,
i hope you greet me with open arms!

blondes have more fun

so the doors to work have been open for only 6 minutes this morning, and already i've had 2, count 'em 2 compliments on my hair!!! first tony, (the cute straight man i work with) who asked me where i get my hair done, due to the fact that he's thinking of getting blonde highlights soon too. and then another cute young man (a customer this time) asked me the same thing!! all in the span of like 10 minutes!!! now i'm not tooting my own blowhorn or anything, actually i'm more surprised than flattered...especially since i didn't do anything special to it this morning!

but then it got me thinking; if my hair were currently brown, it probably would not evoke the same reaction that it does when it's blonde!

now coming from someone who's hair's been every color under the rainbow (well not every color) i must say that i have always been partial to blonde. so the saying is totally true in my opinion; not only do blondes have more fun, but they ARE more fun!! now it's not a cry-out for attention or anything, even though we all know i'm sometimes a whore for it, but i've been a brunette, a redhead and i've even had black hair...and i must say that when i'm blonde, that's when you turn the most heads!!

there's something about a blonde that just catches the eye. not that they're more attractive, but it just draws attention!! whereas darker colors tend to fade into the background. you can see a buxomous blonde coming at you a mile away!! what's funny is that i don't normally find blondes attractive (hence my brunette of a honey), although i must say that brad pitt as a blonde totally turns my hardcore crank!!

but as the weather changes, so does the hair color...there's just something about being blonde in a snowstorm that doesn't quite work...

i do

have you noticed recently the rising number of stars OUR AGE who are getting ready to wed? avril lavigne, nicole richie, paris hilton, pink, christina aquilera...and the average age of these people is what, like 23?!? is this all of a sudden appropriate for people to get married at such a ripe age? is marriage suddenly dare i say, trendy??

personally i find it just hilarious that all these people are friends too!!! and they're all about the same age. what did they just wake up one day and all decide they want to get married...then all they had to do was find some poor schmuck to propose, and what, a new trend is born?!?

my parents got married when they were 18 years old...crazy, eh? and they're still together. yes, my tree-huggin'-hippy-earth-lovin' parents are still in love...isn't that cute? but sad as it is to say, i don't think that "paris and paris" will be joining my parents as part of the statistical group that stays together.

and on that note; isn't it just typical hilton behaviour to find/fall in love with someone who shares the same frickin' name as you??? (for those of you who don't know, paris hilton is currently engaged to paris latis; a greek shipping heir a few years her junior...fuckin' hilarious isn't it?? and he's greasy too, and not greasy in a good johnny depp way either)

personally i love the idea of getting married young...sure it's not for everyone, and i don't think that it's completely necessary to carve one's relationship in stone (like the idea of marriage suggests) if it's just not your cup of tea...why just look at goldie hawn and kurt russell...they have what, like 3 kids together. and they've been 'TOGETHER' for like 15 years...and yet there's no ring on either one of their fingers! isn't that interesting? well good for them, i say.

as for you little trend pimps out there (that means you nicole richie)...this is just one instance where you're going to have to pass the "i did it first" torch and admit...that britney did it first!!! even if all your dirty/skanky husbands-to-be don't even come close to being as repulsive as hers is...

wait, is that a good thing?