shut up, and do me!!

***WARNING, COMPLETE FILTH AHEAD***
that was a trucker hat that brit wore once, and i thought it might be a good title for today's entry; rather than "under the sheets, part deux".

but there you have, it!! part two is already under way!!

do you remember your first time? i was watching that sex and the city episode where charlotte asks carrie about her first time, and she responds "half a joint, three thrusts...and on a ping pong table". well i don't know about you folks, but my first time wasn't nearly as horrible...well, i guess that depends on your definition of horrible, cause, well, it was with...*gasp* a GIRL!!! i know, hard to believe...(so people tell me) but it was! she was a pill snorting, money wasting, stacked up, little bitch! attractive, eh? god what was i thinking! she ended up stealing one of our best friends from us, turning her from an innocent little ballerina, into a mischevious, chain-smoking, pill-snorting, little slut...

no hard feelings, really!!

i still see her sometimes, actually she used to work in music world in the mall...which forced me to change cd stores...just like that damn little kid forced me to take an earlier bus in the mornings, i started shopping elsewhere to avoid the hideous confrontation of my first...grrr...

my first male experience is something else to talk about...michelle johnson was there when i first met him, remember michelle??? GI JOE, british, surgeon, in camouflage pants, in the parking garage outside reflections!!! how skeezy, eh???? thank god they closed that parking garage up!! his name was nick evans...we were actually friends for like a year before anything ever happened. he was british and a body builder (stupid gym bunnies) and a dj on the side...he was a doctor at the QEII, who i met at a rave when i was like 18...he tried to pick me up, but i was too young. we exchanged digits and that was that. it was forever before anything ever happened. he moved to L.A for work, then one night at reflections he was there!!! came down for a business/pleasure trip, and the rest is history...i never saw him again. michelle and i gush about it, cause he was there for her first time on e, and they dissappeared for like 3 hours that night talking about random things! she always refers to him as G.I JOE, cause that's what he looked like!!

well enough about mr. action figure. i was actually one of the first among my group of friends to lose it! i think renee was the actual first (ryan), then me, then michelle (ronnie), then christina (mark), then eilish (evan)...fuck that cracks me up!! they all hate me now for publishing this on the internet!!

what this goes to show us, is that our first (few) experiences are nothing to be ashamed off, due to the fact that no one's is a good experience!! but i think we can all say that we've/they've gotten MUCH MUCH MUCH better!!

new positions, new toys, new partner(s) -heh, heh- lots of things have played a part in our sexual awakenings.

i don't know about you, but after a while i got right into phone sex...i mean REALLY into phone sex!!! why not! it was fun, it was safe, and it certainly helps you get rid of any inhibitions that you may be carrying around!! it's definitely filthy, but anyone who's reading this and has never tried it, i suggest you pick up the phone, call your significant other, or a random stranger, and get the ball rolling!!!
(my boyfriend who i love with all my heart is probably reading this cringing...or loving it, it could go either way i guess!! don't worry honey, my sordid past is going to stay in the past. but the kinks aren't going anywhere!!)

recently i've come to realize that my friends are quite the kinky group!! renee has recently become interested in 'thugs' and one night stands, christina has basically every sex toy that venus envy sells! no, i'm just teasin!!! i'm just getting renee back for putting all those awful pictures of me with mcdonald's arches in her little slide show thingy!!

the thing is, when it comes to sex some of us prefer to keep it very bottom shelf/under wraps! but i encourage you to put it out there, and in people's faces (wait...) it's much healthier that way.

so there you have it! my first time. i encourage all of you to comment on this entry and tell me all about your horrible first times!! or wonderful first times, whichever the case may be!!

more to cum later kiddies...think of me often!